Having a baby is like having a tattoo on your face. You need to give it some thought before you commit to it!
Being a mother in this generation is fraught with challenges and while we feel blessed to have had children and are appreciative and mindful of this, the reality is that motherhood is bloody hard and quite honestly, very very frustrating at times. That admission and the knowledge and acceptance that you will mess up often, does not make you a bad parent. So having said that, to raise a daughter, is where it gets really exciting.
My 10 year old is extremely opinionated/vocal/fearless/packed with pre-teen hormones:
“Are you really wearing that mum?”
“Do not embarrass me at the awards ceremony tonight! You are always crying when I get an award and everyone knows you are MY mother”
“You and Dad are just gross” (After catching Mr G trying to cop a feel in the kitchen)
“This boy in my class….”(sentence never got completed because Mr G caught the “boy” bit and promptly remarked “What boy….I will break his legs”) to which she responded “I have NO life in this house”.
“Can I wear a bra? Everyone else in my class does”. Again Mr G responds “They have boobs – hahaha”. Cue door slam.
“What is sex?”
“What is a Lesbian?”
“When can I date?”
All of the questions above evoked the same response: “cough, splutter, damn this bloody sore throat, I must go and gargle immediately”.
Bullet dodged. For now.
Trying to find the balance between having a friendship with your daughter, providing her with a safe place to tell her secrets whilst being a mother first, is no easy feat. Harder is the fact that the father in the home is archaic in his thinking and believes that girls must be kept under lock and key, complete with a chastity belt. Pity the boy who tries to date her! I have the utmost respect for my mother now. While I certainly wasn’t as temperamental or vocal, I know that the mood swings and fights about boys weren’t easy to deal with. While I am trying to be more liberated than my parents were, and trying to have a good relationship with my daughter, I am dreading the years to come when clothes/make-up/boys/dating will become a priority and the innocent and precocious child I have now, will be gone forever.
Thank God for sensible and practical Mr G who, I have no doubt, will be standing with his shotgun when the first date arrives knocking at our door.